In the previous post, we left off where Rob (Robert Wilson, writer and humorist) was telling us how difficult it had been for him to start loving himself, and I promised you to look at the general phenomenons his article shows.
Firstly, these days the lack of self acceptance and self love seems to be a general phenomenon. Like a disease that strikes western society: self judgement and blame skyrocket everywhere. As a result, messages such as don’t beat yourself up for this and that and love yourself are pouring on us through numerous channels from helpers, religious and spiritual mentors, coaches, motivational speakers, and influencers, just to mention a few.
Secondly, although it’s already beginning to change, loving others and loving themselves are still not interconnected for many. From the point of view of Karma Killer Yoga, however, these two cannot be separated. The personal growth that practice and all the energized accessories (Anamé crystals, Anamé Frequency CDs, energized water, and even the books Chakra Program and Karma Killer by Anamé Valéria Balázs) bring, leads us all to the truth of unity and to the experience of we are all one.
Thirdly, there seems to be a confusion around self love. For many, this concept feels a bit fishy: as if it meant that a person who has a loving attitude towards themselves wouldn’t be capable of having the same attitude towards others. But if we accept the truth of we are all one, it’s natural that “we” includes everyone, even ourselves. Love, care, and respect in this sense is not limited to certain people and doesn’t mean rejecting others. Instead, it comes from the understanding that we all are manifestations of the same divine essence, in different colors, forms, and shapes.
Then, last but not least, there’s the phenomenon of seeing a point or even a necessity of something, yet not being able to grasp it on a practical level. Or, to put it shortly: OK, I get it, but how on earth do I do it? I see it in so many cases when people are perfectly aware WHAT they should do to change, to solve a problem, to feel better, etc. but feel totally helpless about the HOW. I remember when I was first advised that I should somehow connect with myself. I thought it to be a great idea, but had absolutely no clue about how to actually do that. I tried analyzing my feelings, but it was happening more in my mind than in my whole being, if you know what I mean. I wanted the real stuff, the cellular experience, not the idea. And by removing the blocks that kept me from it, that was exactly the experience I got from Karma Killer Yoga. Being connected with ourself is not something that we achieve; it’s more like our natural state where we can return to when we remove the obstacles out of the way. And the exercises of Karma Killer Yoga do exactly that. They remove the karmic blocks of old stories, fears, and wounds that convince us to keep our hearts protected from more injury by locking it down, even for ourselves.
And now, let’s see some of the 13 ways you can start loving yourself according to Robert Wilson, writer and humorist. I chose not to list them all, and for the ones I did, I took the liberty of changing their original order (sorry Rob, hope you don’t mind), but to group them according to various chakras to introduce the energetic side of the tips, and also to show you some differences compared to the viewpoint of Karma Killer Yoga. I’d also like to give you some additional tips that can bring you even further on the road to shining your light onto the world than loving yourself in itself could.
Carefully Choose Who You Spend Time With. You may not have a choice who you work with, but you definitely choose your personal relationships. If you’re spending your free time with abusive people, then you are abusing yourself. Spend your time with loving people who are not judgmental. Pick friends who are supportive, caring, and accept you for who you are.
Don’t Take Crap from Anyone. If you find yourself with someone who is disrespectful to you, let them know that you do not appreciate being treated that way. If they continue, simply remove yourself from the situation. Don’t allow jerks to ruin your good feelings.
Own Your Feelings. People would tell me to “feel my feelings.” Again another concept I had difficulty understanding. The trick is to acknowledge your feelings, and understand they are normal. If you feel like crying – find some privacy and cry. Work to understand why you feel as you do. Don’t numb your feelings with drugs or alcohol.
Don’t Judge Yourself Because You Have Feelings. Having feelings is normal. You should not feel guilty about them. If you have to cry that does not make you less of a man (or woman).
Learn What Your Feelings Are Telling You. Your feelings are communicating important information to you. Just like physical pain tells you when you have an illness or an injury, emotional pain is telling you that something you are doing is not right for you.
The above tips are basically about connecting with your heart, with your own feelings. We grow up among so many expectations that by the time we should be responsible for our own lives, we barely know what we want, what we feel, and how to feel without the countless shoulds and should nots we have gotten used to navigating among. Listening to your emotional needs, accepting your feelings, or learning to have some emotional autonomy can all be a good place to begin connecting with your heart.
And the practice of Karma Killer Yoga can bring you even further than that. It can bring a lot more than being indifferent to other people’s judgments, blame, or negativity towards you, for example. You’ll see how much suffering we cause each other by doing so, and probably also see the occasions you’ve done that to someone else. It’ll bring compassion: both towards yourself and others. You’ll see how that “crap” coming from someone else is a product of their own hurt or fear, and will be able to see the situation as an opportunity to grow, without blaming yourself or the other person.
Another great benefit is that you’ll be able to differentiate between real feelings and the ones that are generated from recurring thoughts or emotional patterns, which are only preserving a problem instead of solving it. Real feelings have an enlivening effect, even if they are painful, while the rest have a numbing sense, like beating a dead horse. An example of this from my life is that I used to resent my mom for not standing by my side when I was unjustly accused or sanctioned by someone else. Whenever I thought of such an occasion, it would bring up the same feelings of anger and self pity. But these feelings didn’t help me resolve anything, quite the contrary. They pulled me into the old circle of thoughts and feelings. With the practice of Karma Killer Yoga, however, this has changed radically: I allowed myself to feel the deep pain of being deserted, the distrust, and the unjust blaming, as well as the fear and uncertainty of my mom. And that pain and the tears coming from a deep place in my heart let those stories dissolve, leaving peace and compassion in their place.
Acknowledge Your Gifts and Talents. Whether you realize it or not, you have knowledge and skills that other people do not have. Work with your strengths. Find ways to share these with others for fun and fortune.
Be True to Yourself. I’ve previously written about this. Pursue your passions. Find work that you genuinely enjoy. When you do what you love, you will be so fulfilled that you’ll never again watch the clock in anticipation of quitting time. Also, by following your own interests, you will attract people to you who share your excitement, dedication and joy.
Know Your Own Value. Don’t assume someone is better than you. Find ways to assess your skills, abilities, and achievements without comparing yourself to others. Malcolm Forbes once noted, “Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are.” And, when you do see someone who has already achieved what you haven’t yet, try to understand that you cannot know what advantages they started with or what sacrifices they may have made.
The throat chakra is not only about how you communicate, but also about how much you’re able to show your value to others, to the world. It really does help if you recognize your strengths, see your uniqueness, endeavor to live them, and share them with others. So the ones above are really good pieces of advice that all of us can benefit from.
What more Karma Killer Yoga could add to this? Well, sometimes you may know well enough that you should value yourself, you don’t quite know how to do that in a way that you actually believe it, let alone others. When you try to make a list of your values, you may still have the ‘yes, that’s true, but…’ voices outnumbering them by three to one. Or worse. In such cases it may feel a vain attempt to truly feel in your system, in your gut what your head knows.
That’s because sometimes shame and self blame get so deeply interwoven into our being that even if we are aware of our values, we may still have difficulties in actually feeling and living them.
Karma Killer Yoga can remove the blocks behind all that shame, self blame, and the fear that wants to keep us hiding in the shadows. The movements and the breathing are designed to reach the old stories and pains which have created and maintained those blocks, and to get them to the surface, get them to flow, and wash them away.
And in the clearness and spaciousness that remains, something that seemed to be impossible earlier will now feel natural: to own your values and live who you actually are.
Third eye chakra
Focus on the Positive. Eliminate your bad habit of only focusing on the negative aspects of your life because it makes those things seem disproportionately important. I have friends who are police officers, and I see how their constant dealing with criminals has tainted their view of people and tends to make them see nearly everyone as bad. Make a habit of observing the good things in your life every day.
Correct Negative Self-Beliefs. Self-perception will affect the outcome of your pursuits and can determine success or failure. Henry Ford said, “If you believe you can or believe you can’t; you’re right.” A positive self-belief will produce confidence and success. A negative self-belief in our abilities will make us flinch in the moment of opportunity. Often we unconsciously broadcast our self-belief which affects the way others perceive and treat us. A hindering self-belief of “I am not good enough” can be resolved with positive affirmations, visualization, and tallying up your successes regardless of size.
Avoid Perfectionism. I’ve also previously written about this. Perfectionism leads to procrastination. Procrastination is all about fear of failure. My solution is to take imperfect action which is better than taking no action. You can always learn as you go along and tweak or correct what you may not have been ready to do when you began. The important thing is taking the first step.
These are very helpful and useful pieces of advice. It is true that more often than not, we magnify the negative: not only as to what we see around us, but also within ourselves. We also tend to magnify a problem by keeping our focus on it: and as the problem seems to be bigger and sturdier, the smaller and weaker we see ourselves. And quite naturally, believing that we’re small, weak and powerless won’t help us to shine. The story of David and Goliath in the Bible is a good example: had David been focusing on the odds and the size of his opponent, he wouldn’t have been able to win. The opposite is another trap: while self confidence and being aware of our strengths is necessary and can be very helpful, believing ourselves to be omnipotent isn’t; if nothing else, our fate will make sure to correct that illusion eventually, too.😉 Think of the story of David and Goliath once more: David’s power didn’t come from his belief in his physical strength, but from his unwavering faith and connection to God.
The third eye chakra in this case is all about control. The less we can see the truth, the more we’ll buy into the illusion of control. Working with it can help us release it, which is great, because it’s only an illusion anyway.😁 On the other hand, you gain something, too: the strengthening of your creative power. When the third eye chakra is clear and filled with energy, your thoughts and the inner images have a greater power, which means that you’re free to use them for raising yourself and everyone else onto a higher energy level.
You may have tried visualization methods where you keep the image of a desired outcome within you. In case it didn’t really work out the way you hoped it would, the below may be helpful for you as well.
It is true for the majority of us that our inner focus can easily be diverted either by circumstances, the events of the world around us, or by our own never ceasing chain of thoughts. Just imagine if all that energy tied up in those useless thought circles and in maintaining your views, judgements, and explanations could be released and freely used! This is exactly what happens with practicing Karma Killer Yoga by Anamé Program. And something else, too. By elevating yourself onto a higher energy level, the goals you want to achieve will get further away from the self centered endeavors of the ego, and closer to the true desire of your heart, of your higher self. To be more specific: you’ll be more attracted to finding your calling in life than wanting to purchase a new car. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a new car, of course, but as it’ll have a weaker energetic charge than what your heart is genuinely thirsty for, the creative power it can move will be weaker as well.
By elevating yourself, you get the power to choose and act on what kind of life you want to live, and you get the power to create it, together with an increased responsibility. This is the most exciting journey a human being can set out to.
So far, we have discussed mostly the material aspects of how to feel radiant and how to shine your light. In the next post I’m planning to go on with a less tangible part of this topic: the role of our divine part in all this. Come and join me!😉🙏🏻